Parenting Advice: From One Parent To Another

Posted December 24th, 2008 in Family-Kids by admin

I became a mother at the age of 23. I don't think that is as young as a lot of mothers are now days, but it was still scary and exciting none the less.  I found out I was pregnant 3 months into my pregnancy.  Really, the only reason I found out I was pregnant was because of a persistent pain in the lower left of my abdomen that made me seek medical attention. The doctor took some urine from me and came back in and told me I was pregnant.

I was completely shocked and had absolutely no idea of what was going to happen.  I called my parents and they were pretty upset for a little bit but they got over it, just as most parents do.  I was married at the time but the man I was with left me for another woman.  I was destroyed!   I didn't no where to turn at the time because not only was I pregnant, but now I had to deal with a jerk who could care less about me and the baby.  For those of you that have never been in this situation, it is very difficult and one of the worst things I have ever experienced.

I was crying a lot.  I ended up in the hospital six times for high blood pressure which scared me tremendously since I didn't know if my son was going to be okay or not.  I remember my sister having to watch over me while my parents were gone just in case I needed to go to the hospital again.  Then I went to the doctor for a regular check up and he wanted me to have yet another ultra sound which showed that my son was not developing the way he should have been.  By that I mean, I was supposed to be at 35 weeks gestation and he was only measuring 32 weeks gestation, so not good.

I guess he wasn't getting the nutrition that he needed so he was smaller than normal and the majority of the problem was being caused by my blood pressure problem.  Now, don't go assuming that I was heavy and that's why I had high blood pressure, because in fact I had only gained about 6 pounds during the whole pregnancy, which is not much at all.

After that I went and saw another ultra sound specialist and my blood pressure was up yet again so the doctor told the specialist to do a amniocentesis,

Amniocentesis is a prenatal test in which a small amount of amniotic fluid is removed from the sac surrounding the fetus and is tested. The sample of amniotic fluid (less than one ounce) is removed through a fine needle inserted into the uterus through the abdomen, under ultrasound guidance. The fluid is then sent to a laboratory for analysis. Different tests can be performed on a sample of amniotic fluid, depending on the genetic risk and indication for the test.

according to WebMD.

So it turned out that his lungs were good so they gave me medicine to induce labor which I hated I was in labor for twelve hours . By no means was it as bad as some labors but to me it was because I was horribly sick to my stomach.  I couldn't sleep and was just miserable at that point. The following morning my doctor came in and checked me and found I hadn't progressed at all so he told me that I could go on for three days like I was and hope to go into full labor or I could have a c-section so I opted for the c-section because I was so tired. C-sections are not bad at all.

They gave me a epidural in my spine so I wouldn't feel a thing and all I did was lay there and waited until I heard my son cry.  Let me say what I said then, "you never know you could love someone so much until you look at your own child".  I was so excited to finally see my little boy.  He was so little he only weighed 4lbs 10oz.  I considered him my little football because he was about the size of one.  Having been through all of this, I felt that I could offer my parenting advice to other parents:

  • If you find out your pregnant and you smoke, you need to quit, I did.  These smoking facts should help you want to quit.
  • Follow the directions your doctor gives you very closely for the health of your child.
  • Nutrition is very important try to eat healthy.  I had a hard time with that but here are some ideas on how to make diet shakes.
  • Make sure to take all prenatal vitamins.
  • After your child is born you will freak out about a lot but don't feel bad. Mothers all over the world do it to you are not the only one.
  • When you are done feeding your baby make sure to burp them because if you don't you are in for a lot of crying because the gas buildup in there tummy hurts a lot.
  • If your baby spits up a lot and I mean like projectile vomit where it gets all over everything, make sure you tell your doctor because there could be an underlying problem.
  • Sleep whenever you get a chance because if your baby was like my son he woke every two hours and I still had to get up and go to work after my maternity leave was over. It was hard but eventually he started to sleep through the night.  You might consider using some natural sleeping aids to help a little.
  • Avoid pacifiers if you can because they become a security thing for some kids and they won't let go of them . I had to take my sons away when he was two because it was impeding on his speech.
  • The other thing to avoid is giving them a favorite blanket to carry around because my son is four now and he still wants to take his blanket with him places he is like Linus from Charlie Brown.
  • Do not let your baby sleep in your bed because they do get used to it and you can't get them out of your bed once you start doing it. I never listened to my mom when she told me the same thing and now my daughter keeps wanting to sleep in my bed.
  • Always remember to take time out for yourself and your significant other because the health of your own relationship is important.  Of course if you are looking for someone, you can try our online dating tips, who knows maybe its your turn for love.
  • Make sure that you try and just get out by yourself there is nothing like having time alone to yourself. It helps you to relax.

Just make sure you always show your children lots of love and no matter what they do they are still as precious as gold. You will never want to trade them for anything else even if you do think about it sometimes. No matter what, your children will always look up to you and love you so make sure that you show them how to be a great parent because someday they just might be a parent too.